Lazy Night
by Icarus The Owl
Summary: A strange story in a world beset by magic and more mystery than anyone can handle. Watch our protagonist struggle to keep up with the world's insistence of giving him bad luck. Rated M for a whole lot of extreme language.
1. Welp, I guess I gotta help this dude

**A/N: Oh man, I haven't posted on here in way over a year, have I? I completely forgot how this site even worked, to be honest. Anyways, I decided that I wanted to make a unique story, since I've gotten back into reading fanfiction again. So enjoy this quickly written, probably horrible story.**

 **Also, thoughts are represented as 'thoughts', while actual speech is represented as "words". Hope that makes any sense.**

I woke up. The world was a swirl of blinding lights, sounds, smells and everything else. I couldn't make any sense of anything around me, hardly staying conscious, and only barely making out my surroundings. It took me a minute to even open my eyes again, but i found it was a lot less blinding than I had origionally thought.

As the light faded a little bit, i finally figured out why everything had been so blinding when i first looked. I was under a fuckin' streetlamp in the middle of the night. I was quick to figure out that I was laying on hard, cold concrete, right on the curb next to a gas station. I couldn't figure out how to move any of my body, unfortunately, even my eyes. I was stuck staring right at a bright-as-hell streetlamp, doing nothing.

I felt something very, very odd just then. My ear twitched. I probably wouldn't have freaked out about this if i had the ability to more, or if the ear was on the part of my head I remembered it being on. As it was, it was on the top of my head, and I was in a complete panic attack. 'Whatthefuckwhatthefuckwhatthefuck' I thought, horribly confused by literally everything that was going on around me.

"Oh shit, they're moving!" I heard someone shout, as my ears went absolutely buck-wild. I gasped, feeling air rush into my lungs for the first time I could remember. I bolted up, completely accidentally, and I figured out that I finally able to move. Unfortunately, I moved just as someone tried to look over me and bashed their head with mine. I managed to sit up, gasping for air, blinking my eyes and still definitely having a panic attack. I could feel my heart racing in my chest, an uncomfortable sensation in its own right. I looked over to my right, right at what I could assume I had hit.

It looked like a fox, but human-ish? It was walking on two legs, wearing what looked to be pajama pants and a hoodie. It had very dark grey fur, nearly black, and a massive mess of pinkish purple hair coming down its back. I knew I had hit it because it was holding its muzzle as blood spurted out of its nose.

I stared, dumbfounded, and after a whole minute of watching it stumble in pain before I found my voice. "Uh, hello? A-are you hurt?"

It cursed a bit more, which i have discreetly been excluding from this retelling because of how bad its slurs were. It had what sounding like a male, human voice, but I truly couldn't tell wether it was a male or a female. "Shit, fuck that really hurt. Fffffucking rock-types and their hard heads. Mr. Pringle in a nutcracker that fuckin' hurt. Couldn't you have gotten up a little bit slower?"

I winced at that, mumbling apologies under my breath, and then something clicked in my head. "Wait, what did you mean, 'rock-types'?"

They gave me a strange look, even for a fox thing, as soon as they stopped clutching their muzzle. Their eyes were completely closed, which really didn't help on the whole determining gender thing. They said, "What do you mean, 'what do you mean'?"

I gave them an equally strange look back. "What's a rock-type?"

They stared at me, dumbfounded, and gave me an even stranger look back, if possible. "It's what you are. You're a lycanroc, aren't you?"

"I'm a what?", I mumbled, looking down at myself for the first time. I was wearing just a simple pair of jeans and a plain white t-shirt, and then I saw my arms. They were covered in a tan and white fur. I was absolutely dumbstruck, so I checked out the rest of my body. My legs had the same fur, ending in paw-like feet, and so did my chest. I reached up to feel my face, feeling more fur, my brand new swiveling ears, and a muzzle. I screamed, and promptly passed out.

"Oh, shit." I heard the fox-thing say, as everything turned to black.


	2. A Medical Emergency

**???'s POV**

Well, I'm sure glad I had called 911 the second I had found the dude, or I would have been panicking a lot more than I already was. In my defence, if you had found someone on the side of the road, unconscious, you would panic too. The apparent amnesia and the fact that he immediately fell unconscious again didn't help.

I looked around the road again, to pass the time and just maybe the feelings of anxiety. The night sky was dark and blank, the clounds covering up the stars and the moon. The little bit of moonshine that shined through the clouds gave the fog an eerie, ethereal look as it floated through the sky. The gas station next to the kid and I was just as ordinary as any other I'd seen, though the night gave even the most mundane of things mystery and intrigue. I, for the record, am a firm believer in the supernatural and I was certainly hoping the place wasn't horribly haunted. Although, I don't know what kind of shitty-ass ghost would haunt just a regular gas station. The road, sleek and black from the rain this afternoon, still had a few cars driving on it even at this hour. As I was staring down the road, I saw the guy mutter something in his sleep for the upmost time. I decided to try and find anything on him, an I.D., maybe, just so I could know who he was.

He was an average-looking Lycanroc, with a surprising lack of unique features. His face, mostly white with a fringe of tan where his fur spiked out into a mane-like mass of fur. I could guess that he was maybe around 16 years old, possibly 17, and he dressed just like anyone else at his age. I checked his wrists and neck for any medical alert bracelets or anything of the kind. I couldn't find anything except for a plain watch. I sighed, not wanting to do a pat-down to check for anything else. I mean, I already looked pretty conspicuous as a Zoroark kneeling over an unconscious guy, and I certainly didn't want a stranger see me from his car window and think I was a criminal.

Luckily for me. I heard the distant sirens of an ambulence as it came to a stop in front of me. Two people came out of the vehicle, one human and one a Chansey, both wearing paramedic uniforms. They rolled out a stretcher and had me help the dude up onto it, being as careful as physically possible. They had me ride in the back with the boy, both because I wanted to make sure he was safe and also to get some answers from me.

"Were you there when he fell unconscious?" The human asked, as the Chansey started doing important medical things. Stuff with IV bags and a mask, though I'm a dumbass and don't know shit about medical procedure.

"No, sorry. I was just walking home when I saw him collapsed at the side of the road." I replied.

"Alright. Do you have any relations with him, and if so, do you know if he has any medical history or conditions?"

"No, sir, I've never seen him in my life. I checked for a medical alert bracelet or necklace, too, but I couldn't find anything."

"Thanks for you honesty, that'll be all the questions I have for you."

"Ok, no problem." I was surprised that those were the only questions he asked me, which was a very nice relief. The anxiety had gotten to my stomach and I was very, very close to throwing up and having to be on a stretcher right with Mr. Mystery Man.

It took only 5 minutes to get to the hospital, and I thanked my lucky stars that it was so close. It took maybe another 5 minutes to get the stretcher into a temporary room where they hooked him up to a few different machines. Dog, I remembered having to go here way back and right around Mr. MM's age too. Of course, a few nurses came in, all of varying species though I didn't care to put them to memory. They came in and out as the night went on, occasionally asking if they could get me anything to drink and whether or not I was ok sitting there all night. I just tried to keep myself from looking too tired.

Within a few hours, one of the actual doctors finally came in the room, telling me what was wrong with the kid. I honestly was so tired at that point that I can't even remember what he looked like as well as half the stuff he told me, but at least I got down the important parts. From what they could tell, he had gotten some minor head trauma, a possible concussion, and they would be checking on whether or not my hunch about amnesia was right. He also told me that it would be fine if I stayed overnight with him, and I sighed in relief. I may or may not have disassociated completely through the rest of the conversation.

I unbraided my purple hair, used it as both a pillow and a sleepmask, and promptly fell asleep.


	3. Well That's a Mystery

I woke up again in a world too bright. I shut my eyes, trying to block out the burning lights, and after a minute or two i managed to finally look around the room I was in. The ceiling was bright white and paneled, with generic fluorescent lights burning red streaks in my sight. I looked away as quick as I could, turning my head and cringing at my massive headache. 'I hope this is a dream, I hope this is a dream,' I thought to myself, remembering the last time I had woken up. I knew it was not, however, as soon as I saw the muzzle sticking out in front of my face. I tried to remember anything else, and that's when I started panicking again.

I couldn't remember. I couldn't remember anything at all. All I could remember was that bright, bright light and the assault on my senses. I could smell the oil and gas from the station, the rain on the street, and even the strange, horrible smell on the fox-like creature. In fact, I could still smell him, along with the sickly smell of a hospital and, strangely enough, a myriad of animals. I quickly decided to block those all out and return my attention to the room. From what I could tell, it looked just the same as any hospital room I had ever seen. It was very, very strange trying to remember going to any hospital rooms while simultaneously feeling like I had been in a hundred of them.

The only thing I saw out of the ordinary was that strange fox creature. They looked like they were sleeping, with their hair in absolute chaos and covering their entire face. Something about the purple hair shook me as wrong, like it wasn't the right color or something. I honestly had no idea what he was, and I was just as confused as to why I thought it wrong to have purple hair. Anyways, as I stared down the sleeping fox he bolted awake, a mass of their own hair in their mouth. I watched them in silence for a full minute as they choked on their own hair until I finally tried to say something.

"Hey, uh, are you ok over there?" I asked, struggling quite a bit because of how dry my mouth- er, muzzle was. Oof, that was going to have to take a long time to get down.

"I'm," they paused for a moment to let out a sickening sound like a cat throwing up a hairball, "I'm perfectly fine, don't worry about it." They gained their composure surprisingly quickly for someone who just nearly ate their own gair. "Are you ok, though? You were just passed out on the side of a street when I found you."

"I-I'm fine, I think. I've just got a little headache." I forced out with a smile. That definitely felt more than a little bit unnatural, to smile with a muzzle.

"Oh, that's good, super good." They nervously chuckled to themself for half a second, before jolting up like they had forgotten to turn the stove off. "Oh yeah, I'm sorry but what's your name? They couldn't find any identification or anything on you while you were unconscious."

That question fucked me up. Like, seriously, I instantly lost my composure an everything. I couldn't even remember my name. The fox noticed how distraught i looked, and nervously shook their hands (paws?) at me. "No, no, don't worry about it! Don't try to think too hard about it if it's that hard for you. I'm Ham, by the way, and, uh, I guess we can figure out your name later."

I gave them a weak thumbs-up with my left hand, and it was then that I saw the sheer amount of tubes and needles they put into me. I quickly tried to brush that aside and maybe bottle it up with everything else I was feeling at the moment. "Thanks, uh, Ham? Did I hear your name right? It's, uh, It's an interesting name. I'm so sorry for asking this and I'm sorry if it's crude, but... What are you?" I tried giving them a lopsided smile to put off the awkwardness of the question. It really only made things more awkward.

They grinned, accidentally showing off a few pearly whites that, in my opinion, were just way too sharp. "Yep you heard my name right, and thanks, I made it myself!" They then shifted in their seat a little. "Well, I'm a Zoroark, if you know what that is. If not, well, I'll explain to you later. It's not so important now."

"Thanks. Well, uh, how do I ask this without sounding like a crazy person?" I looked at them sheepishly. "What am I?"

Well now they looked a lot more uncomfortable. "You're, uh, you're a Lycanroc. You're kinda like a rocky wolf. I really don't have, um, much experience with many of your kind, if you believe it or not. I'm sorry, I don't know much about them."

"Thanks again Ham. Alright, I've only got one more uncomfortable question to ask. Where am-" I was interrupted by a doctor opening the door and entering the room. She looked a lot like Ham did, but with silver streaks running down her face and much more wolf-like features.

"So, Avery, is it?" She asked sweetly.


	4. Just Livin'

**A/N: I had origionally planned to have this story as a romance and had listed it as such, but I figured that I'd rather not have the story focus on Ham and their boyfriend and rather on Ham and Avery's friendhip/brotherhood. I may get less views for that, because everyone knows that anthro pokemon stories are all about sex, but I'd rather not. There will be absolutely no lemons in this story.**

 **And also, thank you all for the views! I was very surprised by the amount I had gotten within only a few hours of the story's origional publishing, especially since i only uploaded the last chapter at midnight last night. And constructive criticism would be greatly appareciated. Now, onto the story!**

 **Avery's POV**

Apparently, according to the doctor, my memory was completely fucked in every way possible. She tried to sugarcoat it and make me not worry as much, which definitely didn't work, especially since I didn't even know Avery was my name. That was hours ago, while I was still in the hospital.

"Now, Avery, I apologize but it seems we can't do anything about your memory loss. Every psychic type we could find couldn't get even a single memory back." I remember her saying, doing her best to make a half-assed smile. It didn't help. "But we did find something! We took some blood tests and figured out that you had given blood over 2 years ago, and we got your file. Your name's Avery Whisse, and your closest living relative is Mr. Leniwanoc over there."

Ham smiled and waved from halfway across the room, and his(?) face was strangely reassuring to me. "He is going to have to take care of you for the time being, as we couldn't find a way to contact your real parents." She explained, and then turned her attention to Ham. "If you don't mind, could I talk to you out in the hall?"

He nodded and they both started talking outside the door. It was thin enough that I could hear what they were saying with the help of my new ears. "Now, Mr. Leniwanoc, it seems that Avery has been, well, you'll have to see his file." I could hear the shuffling of papers, and a surprised yip. "He-he's been missing for 2 years?!" "Yes, he has, and so have his parents. We can't tell him yet. There's no telling what the shock could do to his mind. He's already in such a horrible mental state. You can't tell him anything."

I was jolted back out of my flashback when Ham hit a pothole. "Sorry kiddo, hope that didn't wake you." He smiled and looked over to me, giving me a friendly look. I still had no idea how he could see with his eyes closed all the time. "Anyways, we're almost to my apartment. Sorry in advance; my apartment is super messy. I haven't given it a proper cleaning in a while."

"It's no problem." I mumbled. I was very, very exhausted and all I wanted to do was get some food. As if on cuse, my stomach gave me a roar like never before.

"Sounds like you're hungry. I'll whip something up for you when we get home."

It only took a few minutes more until we finally got to a rather ordinary apartment structure. Even I, Amnesiac Extraordinaire, could tell that you could find a million of the same exact building anywhere you looked. We stepped out of the car, a perfectly generic car in every sense of the word, and stepped into the building. We entered room No. 612 and I was assaulted by all the horrible, horrible smells. Honestly, the first time I stepped in there it was like a wall of strange scents.

First of all, the apartment was completely cluttered by everything I could ever imagine. The living room had one leather couch and an old TV, islamds in a sea of old knick-knacks, wrappers, and old clothes. To my left i could see a closet that smelled like mushrooms, for whatever reason, and as I inspected it I realized that mushrooms were actually growing in there. I stubbed my toe on a replica sword while wading through to the kitchen on the opposite side of the room. Ham was busy cooking something on the stove, deftly maneuvering through the sludge to the fridge, the pantry and back. The food smelled great, like some Asian platter and I was honestly surprised that I could remember what those were.

In only a minute the only smell was that of the food, as I greedily sucked down the delicious noodle dish. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Ham come out of the bathroom, which he had shown me earlier, and I saw him slowly chomp down on his meal. We talked a little bit while eating, Ham explaining to me how I'd have to sleep in his room or on the couch out here, and I thanked him again for letting me live with him for the time being. As soon as I was done eating, I completely passed out on the couch. I was just too tired to think about anything that had happened, at least for the time being.

 **A/N: Again, thank you all for taking the time to read, and I have a little announcement. If anyone wants to have their OC in this little story, just PM me or leave a review. I'll be taking submissions for a while, though I honestly am not expecting all too many. Anyways, thanks again for reading, and I'll see you all later!**


	5. Actually Getting Somewhere

**A/N: Thank you Dragon's Blaze for the review, especially since it was just a nice jab at everything St Elmo's Fire tried nitpicking about. But don't worry, I've already had Elmo post a review on another one of my stories and I already know how bad they are. Still, thank you again.**

 **Anyways, I apologize if these beginning chapters have been quick and relatively bad compared to other fanfics, and I hope to change that with this hastily-written chapter written at 10 at night when I have a fever. I noticed that this story was really lacking on the humor department, despite me tagging it as such, and I just couldn't fall asleep without at least trying to bullshit my way into humor.**

Avery's POV

Want to know one of the worst things to wake up to? The smell of burning bread in the morning. I rubbed my eyes to get the morning sleepiness out, getting just that little bit of fur right in there, before actually comprehending what it was I was smelling. I moaned and forced myself up from my surprisingly comfortable position and got to see my wonderful relative of mine, Ham, dancing around with a burning pan in his hands. I wastching as he tripped on some piece of garbage, accidentally fling the pan into the sink, and lay there. "Uhhhm. Ham are you alright?"

"Don't you dare say another word." He was still on the floor, not bothering to get up. From my vantage point, all I could see were his little furry feet sticking out from the kitchen, the rest of his body hidden my the island in the center.

"Geez, do you need help getting up? Did you slip on a banana?" I snorted out, doing my best not to laugh at him.

"Hey, hey Ave? My buddy? My bro? Do you want to get suplexed?" He said, venom in his voice and back still on the floor. I finally got my lazy ass off the couch I had aparently slept on, waddled my way over to him, and looked down at him. I could finally get a better look at him, now that I was fully awake and not deliriously tired. His hair was completely unbraided, going all the way down to his ankles and taking up half the space in the kitchen. He was covered in either a very dark greyish or very light blackish fur, with little rusty patches at the end of his ears and the bridge of his muzzle, and his eyes were actually open. I got a nice, long look at his dark brown eyes as I stared him down. "Ok, ok, I get it, now can you help me up?"

We locked hands and I pulled him up to his feet and he went back ti breakfast. He was wearing a plain white tank top, accentuating how skinny and lanky he was, and I could see the word "J U I C Y" spelled out in rainbow letters on the back of his sweatpants. It was mostly hidden by his ankle-length, horribly messy hair, which I realized was actually tangled together with what looked like a giant purple tail. I really, really didn't want to look at that anymore, so I quickly averted my gaze away from that and back to the apartment. In the bright morning light I could see how decent the apartment looked compared to last night. Sure, there was still a bunch of trash laying around, but my delirious mind had clearly exaggerated how much there was last night. Either that, or Ham had done a shitty job cleaning up.

"Hey Avery, what do you want for breakfast? I was going to make eggs since everyone eats eggs, but I think you saw how that went."

"Oh, I'll just have some toast, you don't have to worry too much about me." I replied cheerfully, as Ham started toasting some bread, as well as frying a few pieces of bacon in a new, smaller pan he had just grabbed from a cupboard.

"You don't mind bacon, do you? The doctors told me to try to get you to eat real good since you were a little starved when you came in. Gotta get your protein somehow."

"Sure, I'll eat bacon. I gotta go to the bathroom for a second though." With that, I wandered off into the bathroom, less out of pysical necessity and more out of a desire to think in private.

It was a fairly average bathroom, nothing special at all to catch my eye. I looked into the mirror to get a better view of myself, as I hadn't myself in my full glory just yet. What looked back at me was very much a wolf, or at least it resembled one. I had a sharp, white muzzle, bright blue eyes and a line of tan fur in the middle of my face that connected with my veritable mane of tan and white fur. There were black spikes of fur that ran out of my mane and a little black at the tips of my swively ears. I felt at them, massaging them with a few fingers and I was surprised at how sensitive they were. I fekt my black, wet nose at the tip of my muzzle too. I felt something moving behind me, spotting a long tail sticking out of my ass, wagging very slightly. Something about everything, from the tips of my ears to the long nails on my fingers, all the way down to the feet I stood on just didn't make sense in my mind. I couldn't figure out what felt wrong about it, and even though everything felt perfectly natural there was still a nagging voice in the back of my mind that there was something amiss.

I quickly turned my thoughts to what I could recall. I remembered waking up on the street, being taken to the hospital, having Ham take me home, but no matter what I tried I couldn't remember anything else. Even thinking about how I knew what Asian food was or whether or not I liked bacon just came as a hunch. Just an instinct. Well, in any case, I decided to myself that I'd do my best to try and figure out what was going on with me, and the best way I could do that was by sticking around Ham. After all, he was the one feeding me and would probably be the one taking care of me for a while.

Speaking of Ham, I could hear him shouting from the other room, yelling "Hey Avery, breakfast's ready! Hope you like too crispy bacon!" And at that, I rushed back into the living room to see a plate of bacon and toast on the couch. Maybe not the best place to put food, but who was I to complain? Especially since so far Ham had only ever been super nice and welcoming to me. I heard the sound of a sink, and watch him come out from the bathroom and start chowing down on some bacon of his own.

"Now, mmh, I got a letter from the government," He started saying, pausing every few moments to choke down some chow, "And I guess I'm now technically your legal guardian?" He paused again, eating a piece of bacon whole. "And anyways, I'm apparently going to be getting some money for, you know, taking care of you. Foster parent style, I guess. Oh, and also I've heard that you've been enrolled in the local high school so you'll have to start going there in a week or two. They still haven't filled out all the paperwork or really put you into the system, since you kinda just came from the hospital and it's the middle of the school year."

I listened intently to his news, still slowly making my way through my buttered toast, occasionally nodding along. I tried to look all nonchalant about it, even though I was secretly panicking inside at the mention of school. I had absolutely no idea about, well, any school subjects really. I couldn't remember anything school-related, just like everything else. Ham must have seen the worry in my eyes, and said, "Don't worry bro, school will be fine. They're good at figuring out how to deal with situations like yours."

I decided, now would be the best time to break the news to him. "But, uh, Ham, I, uh, I, I don't really know how to be a Pokemon." The word Pokemon just popped into my head and clicked. It felt like the right word, and I really was not going to mess with my instincts.

Ham looked thoughtful for a second, audibly humming and thinking. I could practically hear the gears in his head turning. Then, suddenly, he clapped his hands together and pointed at me. "You, my good sir, are going to get a good taste of Ham's Pokemon Training School for Amnesiacs, a week-long program for amnesiacs who don't know how to Pokemon. Welcome aboard!" He exclaimed, making me chuckle, as he went back into his room, giving me a good look at the back of his sweatpants again. I didn't think I'd ever be able to take him seriously, and definitely not with "J U I C Y" printed on his ass.


	6. Ham's Training School for Amnesiacs

**A/N: I'm going to be brief about this because I don't really have much to say, but... Thank you all again for the views! It means a lot to me that you all seem to be enjoying this shitshow. I apologize for how brief and weak this chapter is, I just had no ideas for how to get this part going. And as a reminder, I'm accepting OCs to add into these future chapters, since I really don't have many characters planned yet. Ans as for the title change, I just felt it waa fitting. Wayward didn't really fit what I think I'm goind for. Anyways, onto the story!**

Ham's POV

You know, I may have accepted to take in my amnesiac cousin, but I really wasn't expecting just how much he didn't know. Which, as it turned out, was literally everything.

"So it looks like you know how to read and write, that's good. But you don't know anything else? Anything, at all?"

"No, sorry. I just... can't remember anything." Avery looked down in shame as he replied, ears drooping and tail sagging. I watched him swat his own tail away and sigh deeply.

"Don't sweat it bro, nobody's expecting you to remember anything all too soon. Cheer up! I'll get you all up to speed on everything you need to go." I gave him a toothy grin. I really hoped it looked assuring, but who knows? I've never been that much of a people person.

And, well, that's how our week went. I taught him everything I could think of, from how Lycanrocs work to the basics of the basics when it came to our world. O had to teach him that there were not only humans and us 'morphs, but regular Pokemon as well. Teaching him what a Pokemon was was a very, very pleasant experience and definitely one I didn't want to relive again. I did manage, through some grace of Dog, to teach him just enough to know he would be fine in high school. I didn't doubt that he would be bullied, after all, I had been bullied and I didn't even have amnesia. But what can you do when the government's pressuring you to send your cousin to school?

Avery's POV

That week was hectic. We had just enough time to cram in as much knowledge as possible, get me an outrageous amount of school supplies, get me some actual clothes and ease my worries, at least a little bit. There was always that nagging anxiety in the back of my mind every time I thought about school, but I convinced myself to not think about it.

And so, I was in the car, having Ham drive me out to the high school where I'd have to spend the next 2 months until summer vacation. Ham had been constantly making puns since we got into the car in an attempt to cheer me up. Honestly, he was a big part of my worries, especially since he had the word "Valid" spelled out on the front of his t-shirt. I had grown accustomed to his, well, strange sense of fashion, but I knew that at least a few kids would see it and relentlessly tease me about it.

"Hey, Avery, I just can't ignore the signs that your're feeling a bit down. You need to stop worrying and yield to your inner animal! C'mon, just get up and go! Pick yourself up off the curb and start up again. I know you must be exhausted but you've got to rev up your engines and get a head start!" I groaned as he ruffled my hair with his free hand. 5 minutes, I had counted. 5 full minutes of only car-related jokes. The worst part was that I hadn't heard a single repeat yet.

"Do you ever run out of puns?"

"Never. I've dedicated 2 whole sections of my brain to memorizing them! Great, huh?" He replied cheerfully. I groaned again. I had learned to hate that innocent, cheerful tone of voice. "I'm just ribbing ya, little dude. You good?"

I sighed, keeping my eyes on the road while Ham lapsed into a serious mood for once. "Yeah I'm fine. I'm just nervous about going to school."

"That's perfectly fair. Every kid your age is nervous about school. Do you have anything that realky sticks out as nerve-wracking?"

I didn't want to get more anxious than I already was so I just shook my head no. Just then we took a turn and found ourselves in the parking lot of the high school.


	7. School

**A/N: Today is officially the last day of my spring vacation so I probably won't be belting out 2 or 3 chapters a day like I have been lately, but I hopefully will still update this. Maybe it'll go down to a chapter or two a week, but I promise that I'll still keep this story alive, unlike my other ones.**

Avery's POV

"So are you sure you've got everything?" "Yeah of course." "Have you got some water? Your lunch?" "You made me pack three water bottles this morning and gave me money for a school lunch." "Alright. How about your phone, did you bring that?" "I don't have a phone, Ham." I sighed and got out of the car, grabbing my backpack on the way out. "See you Ham, I've got to get to school now."

He waved, amd somehow the lettering on his hoodie disappeared. It wasn't the weirdest thing I had seen happen near Ham, so I didn't get caught up about it. "If anyone tries to bully you I'll fuck 'em up!" He shouted after me, and as I gave him one last wave, he drove off to work.

I looked back up at the school. It was tall, tan, with rectangular buildings and the words "Lazy Night High" sculpted onto the front. There was a large field of grass in front of the school, split in two by a concrete walkway where numerous other students were already walking down. I could see humans, Pokemon, Pokemorphs all with the same bored expression. Inside was just a maze of hallways, lockers and classrooms, choked to the brim with bustling students. I had been here once before with Ham, touring around and getting a feel for where my classes were, but it was much harder navigating when you couldn't see over the shoulders of anyone around. I silently cursed my body for being so short.

After a minute of trudging through the crowd, I finally made it to room 460, my first class of the day. Chemistry class. I steeled myself, turning the handle, and pushed through the door. The smell was like a wall. I'm going to be completely real here, Ham's apartment smelt better than this dogdamn dumpsterfire, and at one point there was a literal dumpsterfire outside the window! I can't even begin to describe what that experience felt like. I just ignored the smells and fought my way inside.

It, well, it was a chemistry classroom. The desks were all aligned in rows, like any classroom, but on the edges of the room were outfitted with sinks, cupboards, and supply closets. Behind the teacher's desk up front was a Pokemorph that looked mostly like a fox, but with leaflike ears and a small leaf on his forehead. I remembered that that was what a Leafeon looked like, and I silently thanked Ham for making me memorize the entire Pokedex. He was working on his computer, and on the board behind him was "pick your seats!" written. I was kinda doubting whether or not that came from the teacher, since it looked like a lovestruck 11-year-old girl's handerighting, complete with little hearts instead of dots above the i's.

I sat down in a random desk, well before any other students had gotten there. In a minute a few students wandered in, sitting down in their respective seats and I immediately became worried that I had taken somebody else's, until another Pokemorph came in the classroom, grinning like a lunatic. From the blue, black and yellow fur I could tell pretty easily that he was a Luxio. Well, also from the star-tipped tail and the fact that it looked like he had just chugged a thermos full of espresso.

He vibrated- ahem, walked over to the desk and sat down next to me. "Hey there, you look new! What's your name? My name's Knife and I'm a Luxio!" He belted out in rapid succession. I, well, I did my best to keep up with him.

"Yeah I just transferred. My nam's Avery, and I'm a-" I was interjected by Knife before I had even finished my sentence.

"You're a Lycanroc aren't you? I've never met a Lycanroc before! I've always wanted to meet one of you and now I get to! It's so nice to meet you!"

I smiled at the energetic Luxio, honestly charmed by his overly-enthusiastic nature. "Nice to meet you too, Knife."

I, of course, wasn't going to question the name of the Luxio. When your cousin is named Ham, you just get used to it.


	8. A Ballad for Mac and Cheese

**A/N: I should really stop writing these things at 11 at night. Although I'm not sure if anyone reads these things, I'm still going to thank you all for how much attention this story is getting! Jemsus Cripes, the view literally quadrupled in one day!**

Avery's POV

Knife had finally settled down. Maybe. As I glaced over to him, I saw that he was still visibly shaking fast enough to make small static shocks in his seat. I put that out of my mind quickly, instead paying attention to the people all trickling into class and coalescing together into three-person friend groups. I saw a Glaceon girl with a Delcatty and a kind-looking Ninetales comparing homework notes, five different fighting-types arguing over who had the biggest muscles, a Blaziken getting advice from the Leafeon teacher, etcetera etcetera.

I laid my muzzle down on the desk, eyeing the other students while simultaneously listening to Knife talk about his future plans, goals in life and his plan on becoming a millionaire. Hey, it was interesting! As I quickly repressed those emotions, I saw the door handle literally break off in the hands of a large fighting-type I couldn't remember. They all kinda blended together in my mind. And then I saw him saunter over to where I was sitting.

"Hey, you're sitting in my seat." He growled, as I gulped and saw my life flash before my eyes. Those two horrid, grey, muscle-riddled arms could break my puny rock body in twain. I did what I thought was a perfectly fine reaction for any normal person who didn't want their spine broken, which was to stand up and grab my backpack.

I saw him put up his hands in a show of non-hostility. "S-sorry, I didn't mean it that way! I'm sprry that it sounded kinda agressive b-but I've just been having a bad day.

I stopped in my tracks, truly and deeply surprised that this wasn't the cliché, new-kid-gets-beat-up-by-bully story that was prevalent in literally every story I'd read about a new kid in school. I gave the dude a quick, nervous smile. "It's no problem, I'm sorry I took your seat! I'm just new here."

He gave me an equally nervous smile and put out his hand to shake. "You can have it. I'm Trevor, by the way, and I'm so sorry for accidentally scaring you."

I returned the shake (can't leave a bro hanging) and laughed it off. "I'm, fuckin, uh," I forgot my name for half a second. "I'm Avery, nice to meet you Trevor."

He went and sat down in a different seat, a few desks away from me, and I melted back down into my chair. A few of the other kids had been staring through the whole event, and let me tell you, I was not good with attention.

The rest of the period just evaporated, and before I could think I hear the bell ring, just at 11. I could respect a school that had its period end at nice, solid times instead of some other bullshit like 11:16. Fuck that, and fuck schools that do that. It turned out that even when I get lost and stumble around for 5 minutes before getting to my next class I was perfectly fine with time. In fact, I was perfectly on time to art class, where the assigned seat took me right between that Glaceon I had seen earlier and the Ninetales guy.

He was actually the one to strike up conversation, with a smile very reminiscent of Ham's. "Enjoying your first day?"

"Yeah, yeah, I guess I am. I kinda expected it to be worse." Maybe, just maybe words weren't my strong-suit.

"Man, I was really expecting that Trevor dude to just fuckin' deck you."

"Hey Pyre, don't say that! It's horribly rude." The Glaceon interjected, pushing up her glasses and giving him a venomous look.

"Oh shut it Christie, I'm just messing with him! Can't you take a fucking joke?" He was returning the look with a burning stare. I scooted back. I didn't doubt that if I had stayed between their glares I would have spontaneously combusted under the pure pressure.

They were interjected by the teacher, a bored looking Smeargle, and the class started. It was art class, alright. Passed by like the wind, and as soon as it turned to 11:30 the bell rang. I felt myself pulled along by Pyre and Christie, rather forcefully, all the want to the cafeteria. I just accepted it, like I accepted the cardboard-tasting mac and cheese.


	9. A Symphony of Mac And Cheese

**A/N: I lied. Here, have an exposition chapter and some instant mac n cheese.**

Avery's POV

I was digging into my ravaged mac and cheese still, the cheese sauce splattering all over my maw as I ate. I didn't particularly give a shit about what the other students thought about my eating habits. What are they going to do, bully me for eating my mac and cheese like it's the end of the world? I already had my amnesia, my anxiety, my looks, my habits, and everything else about me to make fun of, so what were they gonna do with a little mac and cheese?

I thought back to where I had been only a week ago, lying on the cold, hard concrete under a bright as fuck streetlamp, in pain and craving mac and cheese like a motherfucker. Even in all that pain, even with my unknown rescuer stanging over me, mac and cheese was all I could think about. I craved the creamy, golden sauce, the thick noodles, all I wanted was that kind of comfort food. I could just imagine a Iron Chef making the noodles themself, showering it in a deluge of golden deliciousness, adding a crisp layer of added cheese for some additional texture...

My mind drifted off while my body mechanically shoveled mac and cheese into my mouth. I hadn't really thought of myself as one for self-reflection, seeing as I hadn't really been fazed all too much by my amnesia. I accepted it easily, like a lot of different things, but now was my time for an existential crisis based around mac and cheese.

So far, there had only been 4 or 5 big moments, but all of them were when I was eating some good ol' mac and cheese. The first I could remember on the second day, just around lunch time...

 **Avery's POV, 6 days ago.**

"Ham, didn't the doctor say that you were my closest living relative? What happened to my parents?"

I heard him take a sharp and quick breath, like he had just been punched right in the stomach. He turned around, a fork full of instant mac and cheese in his mouth, and a wide eyed, suprised look on his face. He averted his gaze, finding something particularly interesting going on with his feet. "Look, Avery, I'm-I'm not sure if I can tell you just yet. The doctors said that your mind still might be a little fragile, because of the malnutrition and, you know..."

I crossed my arms in frustration. "Ham, I know they're probably dead. I can take it."

He made that sound again. Another punch to the gut. "Fuck, Avery, I don't know if I can!"

"Please? Ham, if I don't have any parents I at least want to know what happened with them. Give me a lie, at least, just something I can go on."

I saw the resolve fade out of him. His shoulders slumped, he looked me in the eyes, and said, "Fine. Your dad died of a heart attack 3 years before your mother died. She was devastated for the three years he was gone. She went to therapy and shit like that but gave into alcoholism. She abandoned you when you were 11. I wasn't old enough to take you in then, but my parents were willing. Because of complications with the paperwork, it took years to be able to adopt you. At that time I had already moved out and had gone to school, but from what I heard, you just vanished. You were considered a missing person for years."

His steely eyes dissolved as he broke eye contact with me. I uttered only one word. "Oh."

 **Avery's POV, Present**

I stared at the finished bowl of mac and cheese, still thinking about what Ham had told me. It was a pretty depressing story, but it felt right to me. Since I had gotten amnesia, I just ran off of gut feelings and instincts, and while I think that wouldn't be very accurate for anyone else, it worked for me. Like in Chemistry, I had breezed through the worksheet just off of instincts and small chunks of memories that popped up in my mind.

My mind shot to the next memory like the bullet.

 **Avery's POV, 5 Days Earlier**

I looked at the chart Ham had printed out and stapled to an easel. It was a small illustration of a Lycanroc dude and his insides, names and descriptions pointing to each and every organ in his body. It was more than a little odd seeing someone so similar to me, even though I knew it was just a drawing. Ham rapped the picture with a platic ruler and pointed at the Lycanroc. "This, my bruh, is what you are. A Lycanroc. You're a rock-type, nicknamed the "Wolf Pokemon". You got this?" I simply nodded, as he tore the sheet away, revealing a picture of what looked like a more orange version of a Lycanroc, and a strange, red, evil-looking wolf pokemon. "Your species has a total of three different forms, depending on what time of day you evolve. You are the Midday form, because you evolved in the middle of the day. Theres the Midnight form as well, the red and horrifying-looking Lycanroc, which you don't have to think about. Then there's the Dusk form, the orange one, which can only happen if you have a special ability and you evolve at exactly 6 P.M. Any questions?"

 **Avery's POV, Present Day.**

I was ripped out of the memory by Knife vibrating over to my table and sitting down next to me. The table shook from his pure, unrivaled energy. "Hey Avery are you ok? What's with the mac? Why are you sitting all alone? Why did you eat so much mac n cheese?" He rattled off his questions, and I saw three more people approach the table and sit down. Trevor the Machoke, Pyre the Ninetales and Christie the Glaceon. They were still arguing, Trevor was getting really freaked out by Knife's incessant vibrations, and I was still eating mac and cheese.


	10. The Clock Strikes Thirteen

**A/N: I've been sorta dreading this chapter for a while now, because this is where I get to start on actual important events instead of exposition, meeting characters and long-winded rants about mac n cheese. It will be a lot different than any of the previous chaoters, so you have been warned.**

 **Avery's POV**

I jolted like I had been hit with an electric shock right in the middle of English class. Something felt horribly, horribly wrong to me. I coukd feel perspiration all over my body, I could feel my heart beating a million times faster than it should, banging against my chest. I was completely paralyzed, not a muscle would move, and that's when I heard it.

A bell banged loudly in my ears, wracking my brain and forcing my hands to go to my head. My vision blurred as my eyes shot over to the clock on the wall. The hands were pointing to where the 1 would normally be, but instead, there was a 13. I heard the bell bang again, rapturing my brain. I could vaguely feel Knife put a hand to my shoulder and ask if I was ok- I couldn't respond. Nothing would work.

Just as the third bell rang, I heard a long, shrill shriek and the teacher, a nice Sentret lady, shouted something at everyone. My eyes were fixed upon the 13 on the clock, something which filled me with so much unnatural fear that I just couldn't look away. The fourth bell rang, as did the fifth, and then Trevor lifted me up, getting my eyes off the clock. He dragged me underneath a nearby desk and covered my head with his huge arm, but I still couldn't move.

The sixth bell rung. The seventh. The eighth. I clutched my head but the pain couldn't stop. It felt like someone was bashing it in with a hammer, like I was being stomped on by a herd of Tauros. The ninth bell rug. The tenth. The eleventh. The twelfth. Each chime sent my body into spasms. I didn't want to know what would happen on the thirteenth.

The thirteenth bell rung. The pain stopped, and it faded, my muscles relaxed. I found myself able to blink again, to hear again. I looked over to my right, at a sea of people hiding under their desks. Then, the wall exploded.

There was debris, a smoke cloud of concrete fragments that scratched my throat as I hyperventilated, and I saw chunks of materials stuck into walls around me. Someone's desk had been flipped and had stopped a razor-sharp shard of concrete the size of my head from impaling the Glaceon huddling behind it. Everything was still for 3 seconds, as I counted my slow breaths. I forced myself to calm down. As soon as my heart stopped bullying my other internal organs, I looked back at the exploded wall.

The entire wall and chunks of the floor nearby were just completely collapsed. The surrounding courtyard, normally bright green with well-manicured grass, was completely burnt to a crisp. The blackened soot floated through the air. I couldn't see anything else for a good 5 seconds, but when I did, I knew the creature was responsible for the detruction.

It reached its head around the side of the building. I saw spinning rays of teeth spiking out from an exposed pink lip, whirling like some perverted meat grinder. Blue, rubbery skin started from there, with some yellows and oranges, and then its massive eye. The eye itself was as big as a small car, and the head had to be at least the size of our classroom. Its grotesque, milky white pupil stood out in its otherwise bright red eye, but even when its gaze rolled over us, it didn't seem to notice anything at all. It kept moving past, hardly bobbing. A dozen long, blue strands came out of the back of its head, and a large, think neck came down and out of sight.

I noticed a small, black and purple body crawling up the neck.

 **Ham's POV**

I clung to the beast with all the climbing skills I could muster in this time of need. My short, red claws hardly punctured the oild, rubbery skin, but I only needed a small amount of traction to regain my footing after the crash. I had realized earlier that the creature was heading for the school, and in a desperate bid for the survival of the students I had to latch onto the beast and crawl along its neck. Once it noticed that I was hanging onto it, it thrashed around to get me off it, bashing the school building and electrifying the grass field.

I snarled and began crawling my way back up the neck, but I felt something watching me. I moved my gaze into the classroom that had likely been completely demolished, and I saw my cousing staring at me. He was covered in dust, standing dumbfounded, and I briefly let go with one hand to give him a thumbs-up. With my newfound determination I leaped up the neck, jumping and barely using my hands or feet, insteady usung just my momentum to reach a particularly vulnerable-looking segment of the neck. I felt power coalesce into my claws and hands, a familiar dark strength. I draw back my hand and stabbed it nearly elbow-deep into the flesh, and let my Punishment attack send pain into the monster.

It reared up and roared in pain as I was flung dozens of feet back. If it were not for the soft ashes of the grass I certainly would have broken my neck as I bounched along the field, coming to a stop. I bared my teeth, and took one last look at the monster. The gross blue coated most of its body, with a long tan streak going down its serpentine belly, ending in a finned tail. I couldn't quite remember what this creature was supposed to have been, but I knew it couldn't have ever looked pretty.

An aura of electrical sparks surrounded it as it charged me, levitating and seeming to swim through the air. It was going too fast, it was too big, amd I couldn't dodge out of the way. I felt another, very familiar power flow within me, as the world came to a standstill. The world had lost most of its color, fading into a caramelized sepia, like old photographs. My Detect worked perfectly. I thanked whatever diety had it in for me when decided who my parents would be, and I was very very glad that my dad had been a Zangoose.

As the Detect faded out, I was long gone from where I had been standing before, safely out of the way of the beast. It didn't know that, though, and chased after the illusion I had placed, trying to do anything to harm it. The illusion, a Zoroark completely identical to me, sprinted to the furthest edge of the campus with the monster trailing behind. The illusion was trapped, something I knew would happen eventually, and I prepared to just up onto the monster when its electric field finally ran out.

It swooped at my illusion, crashing into the field behind it, and before it had figured out that the illusion was gone I was already right at when I had hit with my Punishment earlier. I honed my claws for a few seconds, holding on with only my legs as the monster reared its head and investigated the field for signs of my body. As it was telescoping, I channeled the energy from earlier back into my claws. I braced myself, and slashed with both arms at the rift I had already cut open. I heard a screech that wouldn't be too out of place in hell, and felt my grip go. I passed out before I hit the ground.


	11. A Bloody Mess

**A/N: Sorry about not posting a chapter yesterday, I just wanted to take a little break after that shitstorm of a chapter. And in other news, this story's already at over 300 views! Thank you all so much!**

 **Ham's POV**

Something warm dripped into my mouth. Instinctively, I spat it out, instantly forcing me to sit up and see the daylight. I tried to open my eyee, but they felt glued together, as if someone had covered them in some liquid glue. I wiped at them with the back of my hand, and found that they sure as hell were covered in something at least. I forced them open, and several things hit me at once. First, the world was way too bright and way too pink. Second, everything smelled like the flayed corpse of god. And thirdly, I was also way too pink.

I could still see the blue sky, with a few drops of pink hanging off my eyelashes. I could see the school, still with the broken-ass wall, but now there was a splash of what looked like pink paint. The ground was covered in the pink liquid, pooling in little depressions in the burnt field. I looked to my left, and saw what could definitely be taken as the flayed corpse of god at first glance. Something clicked in my mind, and as I remembered the monster, I noticed something new. Or, well missing. It didn't have a head anymore, and the pink liquid was cascading out of a stub where the neck abruptly ended.

Another thing clicked suddenly, and I was shaking myself in half a second. Maybe lying in a pool of monster blood is somebody else's fetish, but it sure as hell wasn't mine. My clothes were soaked with the stuff, as with my hair, and unfortunately also nearly every part of my exposed fur. I could hear screams coming from the school as children looked through the windows and chunks of missing walls, and I could hear police sirens off in the distance.

I gingerly pawed my way through the pool of blood until I got to some dry land. I took off my hoodie and shook it out, just passing the time until some authorities other than me came along. I couldn't get much blood out of any of my clothes, and I certainly wasn't taking off my pants in front of a crowd of high-schoolers. And just on time, hundreds of the little devils came pouring out of the entrances to the school, clearly ignoring whatever the fuck the teachers were trying to get them to do. I waved at them with my bloodsoaked hand, getting little spots of pink on even more of my exposed fur, and gave them a little smile.

"H-H-Ham?!" said Avery, who had apparently been leading the charge. He sputtered out random syllables for almost a full minute, before continuing. "W-wha-what the fuck?! What i-is that? What are you d-d-d-doing h-here?"

"My job, of course." I gave him a wink and a thumbs up as the police finally arrived, 5 minutes after the giant fuckin' monster had nearly destroyed an entire middle school. In all honesty, I felt horribly guilty about keeping my young cousin in the dark about everything, but I had to talk to the real, actual authorities and send a report. The paperwork would probably keep me busy for the rest of the week.

I watched as the police finally pushed back the waves and waves of sweaty kids, barricading the area with some thin yellow tape. How they though that would stop any rebellious teen was completely beyond me. I felt a hand on my shoulder, then heard someone say "Oh fuck that's still wet" as they shook off their hand. I turned around, and my temporary boss was standing behind me, wiping the beast blood off of her hand.

"Captain! Right on time, as usual!" I said excitedly, without a hint of sarcasm in my voice. I eyed my boss, a lovely Houndoom lady who was the one responsible for getting me enough money to live. She wore her white and gold officer's uniform, complete with her hat. I could see her curved horns poking through the holes she had cut into them, along with her ears. She was not in a good mood.

"Oh fuck you, Ham. You know that theres no police stationed within 10 miles of here." She retorted, giving me her "no bullshit" tone. I could hear the growl in her throat from here. "And not to mention, you never called for backup! We can't be everywhere!"

I chuckled at her. "Just joshin' ya, Cap. I'm in just a little bit of shock so don't blame me for any actions I take within the next three or so hours." I was still definitely messing with her. Maybe I was still in shock, because that would make a hell of a lot of sense.

She scowled. I could see the gears tunring in her head while she tried to figure out whether or not I was being sarcastic. She just sighed, resigned, and finally got to the point. "I'm just going to get to the point. Congratulation on killing it. Could you tell me how you did it so se can all go home and take showers?"

She wasn't the most professional, I've got to admit. "Oh yeah, two Punishments and it was dead. I've got a theory if you'd like to hear it!"

"No, no it's fi-" "So, you know how these things were just normal pokemon? So I was thinking that maybe the whole thing could be counted as a buff, similar to the move Growth or Hone Claws or whatever. So Punishment does more damage the more buffs the enemy has, yeah? So obvi-" "Okay, that's enough, I get it, I understand, now can you stop talking?"

I grinned as cheerfully as I could. "Sure, Cap'n. Just make sure to use some moves to cancel out those moves next time, alright? I need to know if I'm right or not."

I strode off, getting through the wall of policemen with a smile, a wave, and a little blood. I silently cursed my luck when I remembered how far away I had parked.

 **A/N... again: Sorry for the weird and probably horrible chapter, but I just wanted to write something and I couldn't figure out how to get past this scene. But anyways, thank you all for reading. And if you could, I wouldn't mind some contructive criticism!**


	12. Genuine Brotherly Love

**A/N: This chapter will just be a quicky for some exposition and shit, sorry about that. I haven't really been in the mood for writing so I'm just trying to get something written.**

 **Ham's POV**

I turned on the water, getting blasted in the face by a freezing cold deluge. I fucking hated this shower. It gradually warmed up, like an antihero to the main protagonist, and I finally felt a little bit of the stress run off me. The blood washed out of my fur, sending streaks of pink down the bathtub drain, and unfortunately my hair dye came with it. I looked at my black and red mane for a second, sighing in disappointment.

As a kid, particularly as an edgy teen, I had always dreamt of being shiny. Something about being so unique just felt right to me, deep down in some little shriveled pit in my chest. Also it didn't hurt that purple was and is my favorite color. Much better than overplayed shit like blue or red or black.

My thoughts drifted back out of reminiscing, and onto what the fuck was going to happen next. Sure, I had gotten clearance to tell some stuff to my cousin, but he was smart and would figure out everything in 10 minutes tops. On the other hand, I couldn't not tell him. What was I gonna do, show up at his school and kill a building-size monster and say fucking nothing?

Going back to the monster, I definitely came to the conclusion that I was in shock. I still couldn't believe that my measly two attacks were enough to kill it. I wasn't the best battler out of my little squad, and most definitely not the best at pure attack. My theory must have been right, I just couldn't do that much damage on just my own. And what was with my interactions with my captain and Avery? No wonder I was such a pain to put up with, if that's how I act when I can't control myself.

I finished rinsing out the soap from my hair and tail, and stepped out of the shower. I had to pull out the massive hair-dryer we had in the cupboard if I wanted to get out of here anytime quick. I watched my hair and fur poof up as the hot air rolled over it. What was Pho going to do? I hadn't seen him since I had picked up Ave, and in all honesty I didn't think Ave would trust me or my boyfriend after what he saw today. I slipped on some regular pajamas and stepped out into the relatively trash-free hallway.

I heard the jingle jangle of keys and the door close, and I silently prayed that... Well, there was nothing I could pray for that would make this situation any better in any way at all. I resigned myself to my doom and sauntered into the living room. Avery was glaring at me from the doorway, backpack held in one arm and his other hand bunched in a fist.

"What was that, Ham? What the fuck happened? How could you just leave me there?!" He yelled at me, making me wince at the harsh tone. Being interrogated by by my little cousin wasn't a very fun thing to do.

"Look, I'm sorry. I'm sorry you had to stay at school and everything, but I couldn't do anything. The police had to have it handled." I replied, knowing full well than my shitty excuse for an excuse would do nothing to calm him down.

"I fucking get that! The police officer who had to drive me and 5 others home gave us an apology, and I expect you to do the same!"

"Fuck," I whispered to nyself, steeling myself and trying to find the right words for what I had to say. "I'm so, so sorry that you and the school had to get mixed up in that situation. I did everything I could to get it from going to the school, but it didn't work. I'm sorry."

"Well, that's fucking something. So can you please explain to me what you were even doing? What was that thing? Is that what you job been this entire time?!"

"Yeah. I'm, well, as of a month ago I'm a hunter for those monsters. I've been planning to tell you eventually once I got clearance and everything, but now that one's hit public property the whole cat's out of the bag. We're not entirely sure what they are yet, because they only showed up around a month ago. I tried getting them called Ultra Beasts but that's already a thng, heh heh." My poor excuse for a joke did nothing. He was still absolutely fuming, but at least he was listening to my explanation. "From what we can tell, they were all just normal monsters but something's got them augmented and enraged. From what we can tell, they can't even speak anymore."

"So, you're saying that you're a hunter of mysterious super-pokemon and couldn't tell anyone because of the government."

"Exactly! Although I'm more of a scout than an actual hunter. I just snoop around and try to figure out what causes the transformations, along with slowing them temporarily until the rest of my team gets there."

I saw the last of his anger drain out of him as he slumped against the wall. "I thought I was gonna die. It looked at me! It stared right at me! It fu-fuckin c-could have k-k-k-killed me!" He buried his face in his hands. He started sobbing profusely, every other word interrupted by a snort or a sniffle. I slumped down next to him, careful not to sit on his tail, and wrapped my arms around him. He clutched me tightly, holding on for dear life. His tears rolled down my back and I comforted him.

"It's going to be fine. No one got hurt. This won't happen again. I'm still here for you. I won't let there be any more secrets." I whispered slowly, foreign to comforting teenagers. It seemed that whatever I did finally managed to get all the emotions out of him.

"Hey, Ham?" "Yeah?" "When I saw you there, on his neck, I thought you were gonna die too. I though we were all gonna die." I patted his back, gave him a small, genuine smile, and said, "We're not gonna die. Not for a million years." "Good."

We sat in silence for a couple minutes more. Just me comforting him, big brother style. "Hey, uh, Ham?" "Yeah?" "What's with your hair?"

I laughed out loud, and pretty soon Avery joined in too. It wasn't particularly funny on its own but maybe sometimes you just need a mediocre question after a serious situation.


	13. Dating Sim

**A/N: I feel like making this chapter super chill, so nothing important is going to happen. Just the introduction of one major character. Also as an important side note, we've got to 500 views! Thank you all so much!**

 **Ham's POV**

"Hey Ham?"

"Yeah?"

"You never did tell me what was up with your hair."

I glanced over at Avery, chilling on the other side of the couch while we watched shitty movies. His school had to close down for the week because of the monster incident, and I was given a week of paid vacation as well, so we just hung out in the apartment. It was a nice time to get to know each other a bit more and just be a bit more like brothers. "Oh yeah, it was dyed." I looked down at the black and cherry-red hair I was currently using as a blanket. I definitely preferred purple.

"Ah, alright." We sat in silence for a bit more. He was really intently focused on the shitty, campy horror movie we were watching. He seemed to really like horror movies for some reason, despite never getting scared from them, which was just a little strange. What's the point of horror if you aren't scared.

The main protagonist, a shiny Lucario woman, was currently in a scramble to get away from whatever the fuckin monster was. I honestly hadn't been paying attention, if you can believe it. I pulled my phone out of a particularly thick part of my hair, where I kept some miscellaneous objects. You don't really need pockets when you have just fuckin excellent hair. I'd be good as a rock star.

I ended up daydreaming about being a rockstar for a solid 30 seconds, dissociating and just staring at my phone. I snapped out of it, knowing hoe stupid that particular dream was, and I actually did what I had started doing. I sent a few quick texts to my boyfriend, asking if we could see each other sometime this week, and in a few minutes we had agreed on dinner on Wednesday.

"Hey Avery, we're going to dinner with my boyfriend on Wednesday."

His head snapped to me, giving me probably the most confused glare I've ever seen in my life. "What?"

 **Avery's POV, Wednesday Night**

Ham glanced at me, grinning very widely but still managing to mostly keep his eyes on the road. He had dressed up for the occasion with a nice white button-up shirt I didn't know he had, some dress pants and some fresh new hair dye. He even managed to comb and braid his hair, and it was a shock to my system to see him look good. I, on the other hand, was just wearing completely regular clothes. "You nervous, buddy?"

I sighed, leaning back into my seat as we got stuck in another red light. "Yeah, sure, I guess." I mumbled into my crossed arms.

He laughed at my expense. "Oh man, I remember when I acted just like you. Don't sweat it bro, he's realky easy to be around. Just an all-around excellent dude. You'll warm up to him in a hot second."

I grumbled under my breath and refused to talk for the rest of the ride. Instead, I chose to feign interest in the neon skyline and nearly-ruined family restaurants. I was only snapped out of my stupor as we pulled to the side and parked in front of a small Japanese-looking restaurant. I knew it was authentic cause I couldn't read the sign at all. I could see through the window that it was almost completely empty, except for a few couples and an uninterested-looking barkeep.

I felt a shadow loom over me from behind me and I twirled around, prepared to smack whoever just tried to sneak up on me. As I turned, however, I saw what looked like a large, absurdly tall Ursaring dude. He smiled and started saying, "You're Avery, aren't you? Ham told me-" and he was interrupted by Ham literally jumping into his arms. I got to watch this massive bear catch my cousin bridal-style, as my cousin wrapped his arms around the dude and land a bigass kiss.

And so, there I was, watching my cousin mack on a probably 7-foot-tall man while being held bridal style. I was, as you'd say, confused as all fuck. Ham finally finished up the smooch and grinned at the bear. "Babe! Fuck I haven't seen you in so long! How've you been?" "Oh my Dog Honey, you scared the hell out of me! You can't just jump at me all the time, I'm gonna drop you eventually." "It's worth the risk."

They lead their way into the restaurant as I followed behind, completely speechless. I mean, Ham had told me about his boyfriend, but I sure didnmt expect him to be, you know, real. There was something just completely wrong about someone like Ham getting in a serious relationship. Ham shouted something at the barkeep and she immediately waved them over to the bar. We all sat down and the Mienshao bartender tried talking to me. "Hey kid, aren't you Ham's bro?" She asked, sliding me a can of root beer. "And don't worry about the drinks, they're on the house."

"I, uh... yeah, I, uh, I am." Every shred of self-confidence in me was completely gone at this point, and I felt like I had just gotten a concussion. She gave me a frown and looked me up and down.

"Hey, you doing alright? You look like you're going to be sick."

I snapped out of it, shaking my head and pinching my hand. "Yeah I'm fine, I got caught a bit off-guard I guess." I tried giving her a smile, which probably looked more awkward and nervous than I was currently feeling.

"Well, if you say so. Hard to believe that Ham actually has a boyfriend, isn't it?" She joked, and I nodded slightly. She gave me a warm look and passed me another root beer.

Ham and his boyfriend finally calmed down enough for them to talk to Ham's friend and I. "Hey Avery, having fun over there with that nerd Mori?" I numbly nodded again, off-out by my cousin's refusal to get out of his boyfriend's arms. "C'mon and meet my honey, the love of my life, my babe of all babes, Pho."


End file.
